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Silent Days

Well, today has been another silent Friday. Today marks six weeks that we have been number 1 on our agency's list for an infant boy (which may not have been clear from earlier posts). Referrals tend to be given out on Fridays, though they could technically come any day of the week. Our agency informed us that they would be in meetings all afternoon today and that we wouldn't be able to contact our family coordinators until Monday (which translates in my mind to they will not contact us either), which means it's another silent day, and the cycle continues. The hope and expectation that this could be the week crashes down again until next week when we start hoping again that maybe this will be the week. Throughout this process there have been different lessons at the various stages... the latest lesson: submission to the will of God, whatever that looks like. 

I'm thankful I was able to catch this on the radio today. I was listening to Nancy Leigh DeMoss interview a woman going through suffering and this stuck out me:  

I think what you (the woman being interviewed) are doing is helping people understand the sovereignty of God. It's been an incredible blessing and challenge to me to watch you say, "Though I don't understand this, yet I still trust that God is God, that He knows what He's doing, that He doesn't make mistakes, that He hasn't made any mistakes with my life, and I surrender myself to whatever He wants me to experience and to learn through all of this." 
I think of a number of women listening who have their own issues. It may be another physical affliction or a financial affliction or an affliction in their marriage or with a son or daughter that they cry themselves to sleep over at night, and they're saying, "This is so hard to understand." 
God's heart to that woman is, "You don't have to understand, but you do have to trust. Let Me be God. Trust that I know what I'm doing, that I'm too wise to make a mistake, and I'm too loving to hurt you except that I know that ultimately it will be for My glory and for your ultimate benefit."
Surely those truths mean more to me now than they ever did.  


Annie Leppin said...

I'm sorry... these weeks must seem endless. I will continue to pray for you, your baby boy and your referral. In the meantime, please know that your words are incredibly encouraging and I appreciate you sharing your faith and the insights that have come along with this hard time.

Rochelle said...

Oh friend, I'm so sorry. There really are no words, but thank you for sharing your heart and your faith with us during these dark days. Praying for you & Don constantly. Hoping with you for good news very soon. Hugs!

Heidi said...

Praying for you daily, Sara.

Rob + Saidy Tajak said...

Your post really encouraged me today. To trust, even though we don't understand at the time. We don't have to understand to be able to trust. Thank you for writing and updating us on your adoption process :)